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Quite frankly, you’ve got it just a bit too easy. You rise 98 seconds before you’re scheduled to clock in, you mash a power button, and suddenly, you’re at work. PJs still caked to your legs, mouth still steaming from a lack of brushing. You’re a telecommuter, and you’re the envy of the working world. In fact, it’d be just stellar if you’d do us all a solid and add a sliver of complexity to your workday — you know, like swapping out your OfficeMax special for an elliptical machine. And maybe, just maybe, you can convert your laptop into one that’s pedal-powered, forcing you to keep churning for fear of dropping from the virtual office. And no, you can’t ask for donations to cover the $8,000 price tag — your fuel savings from last week alone should just about cover it. Harrumph.

The Elliptical Machine Office Desk: putting the ‘commute’ back in ‘telecommuting’ originally appeared on Engadget on Wed, 29 Jun 2011 07:08:00 EDT. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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Recently few websites and forums published the information about artificial hym€ns being popular among Chinese women who want to fake their virginity. These hym€ns are distributed under the brand of “Joan of Arc”, who is also known by the name “Virgin of Orleans”.

The funny fact is that these hym€ns are coming packed TWO in a wooden box or paper bag. That’s really weird. Why two? Wouldn’t just one be enough? Well, I’ll leave this question to the consideration of readers and meanwhile will provide the adapted translation of website homepage, distributing this irreplaceable (?) product.

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Introduction: The origins of Joan of Arc Red

For women, hym€n is very important. But due to participation in various sport disciplines, premarital tasting of the forbidden fruit and other acts, the hym€n can be damaged and broken. This can haunt the woman’s whole future life. Joan of Arc Red came to solve this problem. “Once you try it, your secret sorrow will be solved”

“J@panese Joan of Arc Japan” was invented in 1993 by Dr. Shiro Hisaki from the Human Science Research Center in Kyoto, Japan. It first became popular among the college students in Seto Inland Sea. In 1995 it was popularized in Thailand and nowadays is used by many women in Southeast Asia, South Asian subcontinent and the Middle East.

I. Who should use Joan of Arc Red

1. Female whose hym€n was broken due to physical exercise (gymnastics, track and field sports, martial arts, etc.)
2. Females whose hym€n was broken due to premarital s€x (active or passive)
3. Females whose hym€n was broken as a result of childhood games
4. Females whose hym€n was broken due to m@sturb@tion
5. Females with congenital defects of hym€n

II. The principle of Joan of Arc Red

Put the artificial hym€n, Joan of Arc Red, into v@gin@. When being dissolved by secretions, it changes into gelatinous mass and quickly binds. After penetr@tion of p€nis and friction, red pigment from Joan of Arc Red will be spread over male’s and female’s s€xual organs.

III. How to use Joan of Arc Red

1. Wash and dry your hands. Take out the hym€n from the aluminum foil package and rub it with your hands. Don’t rub it too vigorously in order not to affect the liquid absorption.

2. If v@gin@ is moist, you can put the hym€n directly into it. If v@gin@is dry, before insertion, the hym€n can be moistened with cold or warm water. Insert to the depth of 5 cm (about the second joint of the middle finger). Do it quickly so that it doesn’t stick to the fingers when you take them out.

3. You can have s€x 3-5 minutes after putting the artificial hym€n, Joan of Arc Red (put it in few minutes before the foreplay, generally speaking it can be broken 20 minutes after insertion).

4. Using it is not painful. In order to achieve the better result, woman should moan as if the real hym€n is broken. After s€x, go to the washroom to clean the bloody excretions. Use cleansing lotion 3-5 times.

5. Easy to use. Clinically proven to be non-toxic and without side effects. Painless, no allergic reactions.

IV. Is Joan of Arc Red safe?

Many [women] seeing the ad are initially tempted by Joan of Arc Red, but worry about its effectiveness and safety. These worries are unnecessary. Joan of Arc Red was invented in 1993 and after nearly 20 years’ development and improvement, it is mature product, with most possible problems taken in account. Dear customers, rest assured with your purchase.

V. Is the breaking of Joan of Arc Red painful?

Not very painful, just a little bit. Otherwise it will create confusion. The material sticks to v@gin@’s wall and its breaking causes little pain as with the rupture of the real hym€n. Moreover, it will emit a small amount of “blood” which is similar to a mixture of real blood with v@gin@l secretions as with the real flow during the first time

VI. Composition of Joan of Arc Red

Natural proteins (without any side effects to human body), synthetic membranes, hemoglobin, water-soluble sodium carboxymethyl, cellulose-based agents and so on. [...]

2_G_1272164329417VII. What’s the difference between the product packed in wooden box or paper bag?
Only the package is different. The principle itself, chemical composition and the size (5 cm * 3.5 cm * 0.02 cm) are the same. Wooden box is safer for transportation. Paper package can be put into handbag when going out. All packages are coming with two [hym€ns], each in its own sterile aluminum foil package.

VIII. Manufacturer of Joan of Arc Red

Miyamoto Brothers Company, Chiba, Kobe, Japan. Come with product certificate and other documents.

IX. Precautions for the usage of Joan of Arc Red

1. Wash hands and keep them clean when using. Don’t use it immediately after shower. The product can be generally retained in the body for 1-2 hours, and sometimes for 4-5 hours. However, the high body temperature and [v@gin@l] discharge will lead to earlier product melting.
2. Should not be used by menstruating or pregnant women. Women having v@gin@l wounds or gynecological diseases are suggested to get treatment before usage.

X. Guarantee of Joan of Arc Red

The expiration date for a product in wooden boxes is until 2012 while the paper boxes are valid until 2015.

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In conclusion I’d like to notice that not everyone in China knows French history and Joan of Arc. Thus, the wittiness of this brand name is possibly unnoticed by most Chinese consumers. I wonder if ChinaHush readers can come up with some creative names that could be used in the Chinese market.

And those of you who want to know if virginity is important nowadays in China, are invited to read my post about virginity complex of Chinese girls.

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Oh, this isn’t weird at all! The Kissing Controller, an experimental project by one Hye Yeon Nam, is designed so that players of a bowling game can impart power and direction to their spherical projectile by performing the timeless act of smooching one another. A customized headset is required for one of the participants, acting as the input receiver, while the other straps a magnet to his or her tongue and goes to town with some literal full motion controls. Thrust is added to the on-screen ball in accordance with how vigorously you move your tongue around, something we’re sure your partner will appreciate. Video after the break.

Continue reading Kiss Controller lets you play a bowling game with your tongue… while it’s in someone else’s mouth (video)

Kiss Controller lets you play a bowling game with your tongue… while it’s in someone else’s mouth (video) originally appeared on Engadget on Tue, 22 Feb 2011 06:30:00 EDT. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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French prankster Rémi Gaillard is back to play some more real-life Mario Kart, and he’s just as fearless as ever, throwing bananas and turtle shells at cars while zipping around dressed up like the world’s favorite plumber. The sound effects really sell this one — next time you get pulled over by a cop, try Mario’s “wooahhohhohhoohhh” on for size. It fits perfectly. After all, as the quote at the end of the video says, “by doing anything, you can become anybody.” Why not Mario?

Plus, you get to see why Mario gets those bananas from crates as he goes by, and not straight from the grocery store. Check the whole video after the break.

Continue reading Real-life Mario Kart prankster returns to the track

JoystiqReal-life Mario Kart prankster returns to the track originally appeared on Joystiq on Sat, 12 Feb 2011 05:00:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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Who’s got two thumbs and needs glasses to see 3D? Not this guy! Francois Vogel’s figured out a way to remove those pesky spectacles from the equation, and he’s ready to revolutionize the stereoscopic industry forever. Sure, you’ll need a monitor with a 120Hz refresh rate, but that’s a prerequisite these days anyhow, and the rest is sweet, sticky gravy dished directly to your eyeballs. Get a sneak peek at the game-changing tech in the video above, and keep an eye out for unicorns (we’re sure they’re around here somewhere). You’ll never look at 3D the same way again, we promise.

[Thanks to everyone who sent this in]

Man discovers glasses-free 3D tech in the blink of an eye (video) originally appeared on Engadget on Sat, 15 Jan 2011 15:40:00 EDT. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

Permalink Kotaku  |  sourceJonathan Post  | Email this | Comments

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(Netease) A Beijing drifter young man named Dai Haifei  built and placed this egg shaped house under the building he works at. He has been living in it for almost 2 months. According to Beijing News, the property sector where the “egg house” is at hoped Dai Haifei will move the “egg house” inside of his company. City Urban Management (Chengguan) of Haidian district said, the little cabin is an illegal construction which should be removed.

“There is someone living in there? I always thought it was just a model!” Yesterday, residents and workers of the courtyard where the “egg house” is placed at all knew about this “model”, but no one believed someone actually sleeps inside. They all liked the creativity, “You can see the grass growing on it during the day, I thought it was a model to grow grass.” a middle aged woman said.

“No way.” A security guard laughed, he did not believe the cabin can house someone.

The property company responsible person said, the company Dai Haifei works for is a design firm, they bought a lot of fresh ideas, and gave lots of energy to the compound. Residents and workers in the compound all like them, and also like their architectural designs.

“However, if staying in it overnight then this becomes a temporary building.” The responsible person said, all temporary buildings must be approved by the municipal sector. He said that he already called the office and hoping to move the “egg house” inside of the company.

Yesterday, Haidian Urban Management said, all construction on the streets, without approval by the relevant department are all illegal constructions which should be removed. If it is built inside of a courtyard, City Urban Management will contact the property management, allowing them to remove it.

“Today all the phone calls are from the media, Dai Haifei and the firm are under a lot of pressure. We will not make any response to the media anymore.” Miss Liu at Dai Haifei’s firm said.

Dai Haifei’s creative house was inspired by “egg of the city” series designed by his firm. The original design was to make people aware of the living environment under this high priced housing market, at the same time hoping to improve people’s living condition and appearance of the city, but it is not suitable to be popularized in the current conditions.

Yesterday, the firm spokesman said, “egg house” attracted media’s attention, we think Dai Haifei isn’t going to be able to live in the cabin any longer. “His career was just begun, and do not wish to be bothered.”

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Dai Haifei (戴海飞), 24 years old form Hunan province, built and placed an egg shaped small house in a courtyard in Beijing, as his home. Inspired by his company’s design, Dai Haifei built the “egg” house with bamboo and it only cost him 6,427 yuan. Now he has been living in it for almost 2 month, rent free. The following is his diary on Douban describing how he builds the egg house.

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My father works at a construction site; mother is a cleaner of a company. Now they are older and their physical conditions are not as good as before. I tried many times to convince them to go back home to the countryside to farm a few acres of land to live an easy life, stop running around already. They said they wanted to save money for me to buy a house to get married in. But they don’t know in order to buy a home in Beijing with their salary will take 2-3 hundred years. I want to have a home of my own, no need to be too big, as long as it shelters me from the sun and the rain. Do not want to live like ants in the remote corners of the city, do not want to give hard-earned wages to the landlord, do not want to spend three hours each day on the crowded bus, but facing the reality of high home prices, all hopes are fading.

In 2009 when I was interning for Standard Architecture, I was honored to participate in “egg of the city” (城市下的蛋) design project. “Egg of the city” series includes KTV house (already completed), Bench house (already completed), small shop house, fruit stand house, recycler house, message pallor house, backpackers house… “Egg of the city” series provides movable small homes for struggling group of people in the city, the home is also a tool for them to make a living. The green plants on the surface of the house become urban landscape. After my internship at Standard Architecture, I went back to school to finish up my graduation design, but the idea of building a house for myself was lingering in my mind. After graduation, I talked to my teacher Tang Doudou about my ideas, he was very supportive and found a few friends to help out with my work. Later I also got the finical support from my cousin, then the building work was officially started. We worked from July to September for two whole months, not counting labor, material costs are as follows:

Wheels 160
Rope ties 125
Grinder 31
Water tank, pump 95
Steel 573
Drills 18
Bamboo 375
Tools 210
Glue 200
Waterproof fabrics 508
Solar Panels 970
Square rods 30
Screws 115
Paint 284
Welders 260
Spray gun 450
Gauze 600
Insulation 100
Grass seeds 110
Energy-saving lamps 36
Air support 50
Plexiglass 160
Washbasin 60
Steel mesh 240

Total 6427

After the house was built, shipping it from Hunan to Beijing cost 3500 yuan, so with less than ten thousand I got my own house in Beijing.

When the house arrived in Beijing I put it under the building of my company. I already lived in it for over a month. I can get to work within seconds, no need to be on the crowded bus. This is considered a luxury in the traffic congested Beijing. I used the money I saved up from not paying rent to pay for an annual pass of a swimming gym, so I can go swimming, also take showers and go to sauna there. I don’t have a kitchen in the house, so I became a frequent visitor of the local restaurants around work. No need to make meals also saved me a lot of time. In the weekends, I can go the local coffee shops with a book or I can ride my bike around the neighborhood alleys. When the house is simplified to just one bed, other than sleeping in it, other things are taken care of in public places, this is a free lifestyle.

The entire process of making the house on flickr

This design was nominated for the second annual China Architecture Media Awards

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“If you don’t pay rent by tomorrow I will throw your stuff on the street”

 

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Media coverage of the story by Beijing News on Netease:

Interview with Beijing News

In the interview, Dai Haifei said his house had been the target of eviction, but because he had no place to move to, eventually they let the matter rest. He had thought about having a real home to get married in, but for now, he enjoys life in an “eggshell”.

Beijing News: How is life after moving into your house?

Dai Haifei: No rent, I don’t need to consider to save money when eating everyday, I also bought an annual pass to a swimming pool. I go swimming after work everyday, then take shower or sauna after. In the weekends, I go walk around in the Beijing city, and hang out with friends.

Beijing News: Your cabin is placed here, will people try to move it away?

Dai Haifei: (Laughs) I was already told to move. The house is placed on the lawn of a courtyard, it is not even the company’s property. Some time ago, property owner came to tell me to move, but I have no place to move to. They could not do anything to me. Now they just let me be.

Beijing News: Have you thought about, one day you go down stairs and your house is moved away, all your possessions are gone?

Dai Haifei: The egg house is a place to sleep, my clothes are under the bed, nothing expensive. (pointed at himself) I only have these, the most expensive thing is the notebook, I leave it at work. (smile)

Beijing News: Your house charges electricity at work, and water is also from your company. Actually your company really supports a lot. Are they considered perks for being close to work?

Dai Haifei: The house doesn’t charge its battery from work, the solar panel charges the battery. My company is very tolerant as for my water and electricity usage, perhaps its part of the benefit. (laughs)

Beijing News: Beijing is so cold in the winter, in this small room you probably are freezing. Before you come here have you thought about such hard life?

Dai Haifei: I did not think so much, in fact, I do not feel very “tough”. The winder in Hunan is worse than Beijing, it’s kind of wet cold. So I think it’s no so bad here, I only sleep here, my blank is thick. I actually woke up last night because it was too hot. My parents also know my life. I called them and told them where I am. They also feel happy that I can save some rent money.

Beijing News: but they also wish you to get married and have children, live in a (real) house right?

Dai Haifei: Yes, they also said I should have a house, find a girlfriend, get married. But they do not know how difficult it is in Beijing. I used to rent, one of those huge rooms divided into many small rooms with wooden boards, only couple square meters cost 8-9 hundred a month. Before I graduated this year when I went home for my graduation design project I had to terminate the lease. They also deducted my deposit for various reasons. It was really helpless. So now I feel free, I don’t think so much any more.

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I think everyone in the known world will want them!” That’s a potent, soul-stirring quite from Honolulu’s own Becky Gray, and her emotions tend to mimic our own. We mean, who wouldn’t want a pop-up MicroLite dongle affixed to the bottom of their remote? For a limited time of indefinite nature, free-spending consumers can actually get not one, not two, but three of these miracle workers for the tidy sum of just $19.99*, enabling them to light up a full trio of cut-rate remotes. Better still, you can use two of ‘em to illuminate the keyboard of your shiny new 13-inch MacBook Air — you know, because Apple decided this solution was better than its own integrated one. There’s an unrealistic video demonstration embedded just past the break, and it’s just a Billy Mays (rest his soul) short of awesomeness. Order now!

*Along with a likely laughable shipping and processing fee, of course.

Continue reading Pop-up MicroLite turns your janky remote into a well-lit, even jankier remote (video)

Pop-up MicroLite turns your janky remote into a well-lit, even jankier remote (video) originally appeared on Engadget on Tue, 23 Nov 2010 07:06:00 EDT. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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(Netease) November 8, 2010, in Jiulongpo district, Chongqing, 4 young men wearing suites were passed out on the ground at the Baguocheng Square which attracted many onlookers. It turned out these 4 young men went to their second around job interview for a sales position at this company. Two of them are still university students about to graduate next year.

At noon, the company leader invited them for lunch. Eager to impress the boss, they competed in drinking more alcohol. In the end they were wasted. At first, they just sat on the ground chatting, but soon three of them lied down and passed out. The fourth guy leaned against a telephone pole, standing unsteadily, occasionally muttered some words out his mouth and shivered non-stop.

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2 of them slept while hugging each other and their backpacks. One other guy made a letter “t”.

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The police eventually called 120. And minutes later three men were sent to the hospital by ambulance.

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I wonder who got the job…

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Chevrolet Cruze Pac-Man

2011 Chevrolet Cruze playing a full-size game of Pac-Man – Click above to watch video after the jump

The 2011 Chevrolet Cruze is a nimble, compact sedan that could potentially turn into a top seller for General Motors. Apparently, it’s also a fan of classic video games. Well, at least the Chinese ad agency that dreamed up this interesting ad for it certainly is. A large room serves as the stage for a full-size representation of the Pac-Man universe. A white Chevy Cruze plays the part of Mr. Pac-Man while a series of Black Cruzes represent the ghosts.

The video is well made but could use a little more substance beyond the driving and background music. However, the song will be with you all day. A bit of a warning though, the song has a few swears in it, which is funny because either the ad agency didn’t notice them or just doesn’t care. Also, the ghosts should be multi-colored, and it would have been really hilarious if they were old Cavaliers.

Check out the commercial after the jump. If you end up enjoying the music, the name of the band is The League and the song is called “F* RNR”.

Warning: Possible NSFW language.

Photos by Zach Bowman / Copyright (C)2010 AOL
[Source: Youtube]

Continue reading Video: Chevy Cruze used to play live action game of Pac-Man

Video: Chevy Cruze used to play live action game of Pac-Man originally appeared on Autoblog on Mon, 25 Oct 2010 19:01:00 EST. Please see our terms for use of feeds.

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